We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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