I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
