It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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