i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
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