She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
