just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
