i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
