Already got asked if we're dating
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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