Tell her she can't have a vagina
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize