I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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