i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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