3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
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