First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
