Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Randomize
