Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize