Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
