he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
