susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Randomize
