Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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