when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
My vagina is officially offended.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
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