Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
