if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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