whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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