I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
