I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
