scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
