Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
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