The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize