He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
