You're so nebulous sometimes
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize