Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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