so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Randomize
