You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Randomize
