Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize