nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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