I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
from now on my penis is your penis
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Rumble strips road head = magical
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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