you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize
