Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
My dad just said "fuck circus"
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Randomize
