Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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