Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Randomize