my mouth tastes like poor choices
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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