Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
