Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I will die if light touches me.
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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