Its about making memories worth repressing
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Randomize
