We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize