okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
