she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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