Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
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