And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you traded sex for a burrito?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Randomize
