worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
