So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
