apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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